... Where in the World are the Worldly Ways of the World Taking Our World?

I don't know. It was an attention getter. Don't ask. Anyways.

We are in the midst of inner turmoil, and guess what? It's internally in the middle of inside us.

The Ameri-Franco Alliance was an alliance in which France and America allied to agree that American and France were now allied.

Considering we are no longer at home here, why do we feel a subtle sense of feeling at home?

If you've made it this far without being confused, can you count how many brain cells you've lost?

This box contains MAGIC!
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So. I and a friend are starting a new blog soon. It'll be awesome.

I'll catch ya on the flip side.

The Spaghetti Monster Event

That's right. If you're reading this, you may be asking, "What in all of God's beautiful green grassed,

cow grazed,

hay manufactured,

agriculture industry stimulating,

91% ORGANIC (still, surprisingly),

globally warming earth is the

Spaghetti Monster Incident?*

In point of fact, that is EXACTLY what I am wondering.

So, this marks the kickoff of the first, yes, FIRST!

Contest on my blog. Guess what? You could win a fantastically amazing prize by coming up with the best answer to this burning question!†

Here are the Rules:

1) Post it as a comment to this blog.

2) You can use any quote I've ever made.

3) You must allow me to post the winning and runner up guess on my main blog.

4) You have to be cool.

5) You must use a keyboard to type the answer.

6) Number four is not a rule, just a suggestion.

7) Scratch #4 and #6.

*No purchase necessary. Some restrictions may apply. Applicant subject to boredom due to constantly reading fine print. Come to think of it, what is a spaghetti monster?

†Prize may not be cool. There may be no prize. If you are the only one who enters, BOOYAH! Someone's actually reading this.

Sharif Don't Like It?

Nah nah nah... Rocking the Casbah! Rockin' the Casbah!

Nah nah nah nah... nah nah nah nah... Hey hey hey, goodbye.

Nah nah nah...? What's with these "nah's"?

Today is Classic Rock day. Aerosmith and The Clash and Poison and all them goodies.

Yeah. So that pretty much concludes today's blog. Yep. Sorry. Maybe I'll feel bad and write something good later.

Ramen is a Miracle Food

It is. You know it is. Really, just take my word for it.

If you've never eaten it, go buy some. They're like 15 cents a piece. Not on sale. Also, if you've never eaten it, where in God's beautiful green grassed, cow grazed, hay manufactured, agriculture industry stimulating, 91% organic (still, surprisingly), climate changing world do you live?

Perhaps Mars, or maybe Russia, where the KGB will kill you if you have food.

Be it the former or the latter, where did you get internet access? Really?

Let's get off the topic of ramen.

Once again, being monsoon season and all here, it rained again. Today it was, in the most extreme form of the word, DUMPING.

Not like guys do to girls.*

I mean in in the sense that it seemed a supernatural force with a giant fire hose decided to spray my humble home. Rather house. Definitely "house."

We'll get to that another time. At any rate, I had a very interesting conversation today. It went as follows...

Her: "Hey buddy."

Me: "You know how I dislike being called, 'buddy.'"

Her: "Sorry about that."

Me: "It's okay, you didn't know."

Her: "Uhm..."

Me: "So..."

Her: "So I think this is not really a very engaging, funny, or in any other way interesting."

Me: "Holy... did you just say that? It's like you were narrating our conversation for people to read later."

Her: "They probably won't notice."

Me: "Are you talking to me?

Her: "Today was ridiculous. Mood: Chill. Current Music: Some annoying guy."

Me: (Looks at camera) "What a waste."

Her: "What?"

Me: "Don't start."

"K."

Anyways, I found out she wasn't talking to me. Uneventful day, besides the rain. Good. Night.

*If a guy dumps a guy, it's about the as socially acceptable as, say, getting castrated.†

†If you are a eunuch, I'm sorry, I did not mean to offend you.˚

˚If you are a eunuch, please let me know why you have a will to live.

Incredimonkey??

So today was weird. It was pretty much the most packed full day of the last month. Stuffed. Like those nasty green peppers that your mom always tried to make you eat when you were younger. You know what I mean. Speaking of full and moms, isn't it strange how Moms are always chock- full of strange aphorisms that don't have an ending. Like,

"Preparation is the key."

To what, may I ask? Life, knowledge, the pursuit of happiness?

Now it's time for the greek phrase of the day.

Novus ortus deficio mens mentis. Or, put more simply, Bardus.

Lemme give you a hint, it's what I am.

It just started raining outside. I am sitting by the screen door, taking in the smells and sounds of this downpour. The scent is swirling around me; caressing my nose until I can no longer think about what I'm doing. The wind created by the falling droplets of water are pushing air that is wafting through the door. Wrapping a pleasant mixture of cool and warm air, it's just what my tired fingers need for rejuvenation. It's like getting high off of nature.

Fantastic.

I think I'm gonna go jump around in the rain. Catch you later.

Reading is Believing?

If you were reading this, (hypothetically speaking, considering NO ONE reads this) and I graphically depicted to you how the world would explode in 2 days, you'd either think I had too much free time on my hands, or I was crazy.

Fancy that, considering I am neither. Unfortunately, people buy into these things seemingly all the time. Take forwarded emails. Millions of people everyday get these trashy weird-fonts-and-strange-colored-lettered emails. Maybe the person who makes these just figured out their computer. Maybe they're a terrorist, meaning to stir up mass chaos through horribly researched points. There are the four kinds of forwarded emails.

1) The Freaker.

In these ones, the author, (whoever they are) always tries to scare you. Be it that Obama is going to ban life, or that the Swine Flu is fabricated by the medical industry, they try to frighten you into such a panic that you will: "Send to 20 friends if you care."

2) The Heartburner.

In this particular type of forward tries to be heartwarming. They are usually "based on a true story." Whatever THAT means. Unfortunately, to ruin these stories' credibility, the photos are usually too good to be taken while "In progress of story."

3) The Teenager.

These usually consist of asking you random questions about previous love lives. At the end, they tell you to "Send to 20 friends and the love of your life will call you today."

Really?

Never works for me.

4) The Faither.

These are like the Heartburner, but with a Faith-based message.

'Nuff said.

It surprises me how gullible people are to these things... It kinda makes me want to blow up the world.

In 2 days. heh heh.

Who I Am Makes A Difference?

Today's writing's going to be little different. Definitely a more solemn note... less stupidity, etc.

I just want to take time to appreciate everyone that has impacted me. Big or small, good or bad, every single one has changed me in one way or another.

In the same way, I realize how I affect people. Some people are weirded out, some people are happy, as well a collage of other emotions/feelings/beliefs.

It pays to take the time to think about how what we do changes the people we seldom react with.

How much more does it affect those we are close to?

We need to be caring people because:

1) What goes around comes around.

2) God tells us to!

3) We can never fully see how what we do impacts others.

Anyways, that's pretty much all I have to say today. I encourage you to think about it a little bit.

Now I gotta go help my Mom with some dishes...